How to (not) be alone with your writing
Monday, January 19, 2015 at 5:56PM 
A few months ago I posted a list of ways "to be alone with your writing," meaning ways to overcome resistance, including turning off distractions, making friends with your fear, and shifting your mindset from writing as a challenge to writing as a gift.
It can be hard to be alone with your writing. We writers know the potential terror of the blank page. We know how maddening it can be to stay with a story when we don't know where it's going or how we're going to get it there. We know the temptation to stop writing, to avoid it, to busy ourselves otherwise and elsewhere. But we also know that if we can just stick with it, there are good things to be had.
Today, let's talk about another way to "be alone" with your writing. I call this one:
How to NOT be alone with your writing
1) Co-working
Last week, I had an appointment with a local writer friend. We met at the library, found a quiet spot near the windows, exchanged a few bits of conversation, and then sat side-by-side in silence for several hours, writing. I worked on an essay I'd started writing -- and then abandoned -- last January.
There was nothing inherently special about the library or the day of the writing date. So why did I get back to an unfinished essay that I'd let languish for 12 months? Because I made a commitment to show up, and I didn't want to let my friend down. Because my friend was writing, so I felt positive peer pressure to do the same. Because I was outside of my normal environment, which made the moment seem important, and I wanted to honor that by doing what I said I was going to do.
(Note that you don't have to have local creative friends to do this. You could have writing dates via Skype, the phone, or with beginning and ending check-ins via email or text messages.)
2) Collaboration
When I created Lanterns: A Gathering of Stories, the whole process was rooted in collaboration, from the six women who contributed words and images to the anthology; to the colleagues who helped me figure out the logistics of creating, printing, and shipping a 50-page book in just five weeks; to my friends and family who held my hand and talked me off the emotional ledge multiple times as I tackled this new kind of project. In so many ways, we do much of our creative work on our own, but we don't have to go it alone. Creative collaboration can take many different forms. Think about who you can collaborate with to create something new or to help you see your vision through to completion.
3) Community
Being part of a writing community connects you to like-minded people and also exposes you to new ideas. Having a creative community (online or in-person, local or long-distance) can help you to fill your creative well and inspire you. It can be a place to commiserate with others when the going gets rough, to celebrate with others when the going gets good, and to cheer each other on. If you're a writer (or you want to be a writer), being part of a writing community connects you to other writers, to what's happening in the world of writing, and to the writer inside of yourself.
4) Classes
Taking a writing class or workshop can be one of the best ways to not be alone with your writing (so that you can be alone with your writing). In a class, whether it's online or in-person, you can connect with other writers, which gives you a writing community and the potential for collaboration and co-working. You'll learn new writing techniques or practice familiar ones, which gets you out of your old internal monologue of "I can't write" or "I never make time to write." Being part of a class can spark connections -- with other writers, other ideas, and within your own writing. Learning can light up your work at any stage of your writing life. One of the reasons that I love to teach writing classes and workshops is that sharing what I'v learned always leads to new learning and inspiration.
5) Commitment & Connection
Each of the ideas I've listed above comes back to commitment and connection. I wish I were better at keeping the commitments I make to myself alone. I wish I didn't need external deadlines or motivating circumstances to be "disciplined." (Actually, I dislike the word "discipline" and much prefer the word "enthusiasm.") But the truth is that I do need those things to write. I could waste time railing against that, or I could create a writing life that works for me. Yes, writing is usually a solitary act. As a writer who also works from home, I can turn into a bit of a hermit when I'm not careful. Reaching out to stay connected and committed is one of the best things I can do for my creative work.
Don't be alone with your writing. Join me for these upcoming online writing classes. (Each class can be taken on its own, but they also build upon one another. You can sign up for two and get the third free.)
One-Moment Memoirs (January 24*)
Tell the stories of your life, moment by moment.
Some experiences beg us to write about them, but we often feel overwhelmed when trying to capture the whole story at once. In OMM, you'll work through a series of writing exercises designed to help you discover and write the stories of your life moment by moment. This live, virtual workshop will help you take a relaxed, yet focused, approach to telling life's big and small stories in bite-sized pieces. Learn more and register. (*a recording of the live class will be available)
Write into the Heart of Your Story (February 1-28)
Learn writing techniques to create meaningful, memorable stories.
This class teaches you proven writing techniques to strengthen your writing and improve your stories. Write into the Heart of Your Story gives you a treasure trove of writing tools to write with more depth, clarity, and power so that your work connects with readers. Learn more and register.
The Writing Life: Rituals, Rhythms, & Practices (March 15 - April 11)
Create a writing life you love.
When you understand your unique creative process, you'll be more relaxed, more prolific, and more consistent in your writing practice. You'll also have much more fun! You'll experiment with your creative process, examine writing as a process of discovery, and practice living the writing life you crave. Learn more and register.
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